dreamer

I wrote an exam at 8:30 this morning after about 4 hours of sleep due to a hyperactive mind that wouldn't shut the hell up. The exam was pretty good. I needed a 59.25% on it to get an 80 in the course, or an 84.25% to get a 90 overall. I can say with reasonable confidence that I got at least 59, and I actually probably got more than 84. To translate, I effing rocked that shit.

When I got home I dicked around for a good amount of time. I was actually "preparing for a run" by drinking some water and reading digg. Then I decided to turn on the TV and What Not to Wear was on so that of course delayed my run for another hour. I finally did get out for a run though, and it really was a beautiful day today. The sky was so blue, and the trees were so green, and the road I was running on is a gravelly back road, and at one point I just thought "Wow, I wish I had a camera".

I'm a country girl at heart. I've never been awed by a cityscape. Give me trees and a clear sky anyday.

Anyway, I had been planning to take a nap at some point during the day but somehow I never got around to it. Like I never got around to studying for immunology either. OOPS. I blame Tyra Bands and then whoever that bitch is (Robin?) on Girlicious. I am addicted to these shows. I am a sad case.

All of this, of course, has resulted in me being SO. TIRED. LIKE. WOW.

But I still haven't studied immunology.

1.     Register for four 4th year hardcore science courses and one 2nd year hardcore harder-than-4th-year-hardcore-science-courses physics course for the upcoming Winter semester.
2.     Wait five months.
3.     Experience exams.

This program works, my friends. Probably even better than I've yet realized, since I'm only just over halfway done.

Maybe I should study instead of writing multiple posts on here.

Maybe I don't want to.

I wish the cell cycle didn't involve approximately five billion molecules that are all shortened to 3-letter acronyms that start with "c". I also wish apoptosis did not involve the same molecules plus about 3 billion more, as well as 2 billion that start with "b". Who the hell designed this? Cdk, Ch1, Cln, Clb, CED, CDKI, cdc2, cdc6, cdc20, cdc28 (I could go on), CAK, CKI, etc. etc., and then we get to bax, bid, bim, bcl, bh3, bad, bak, bok, bik, bmf, and to make matters worse, there are bcl-2, are bcl-xl and bcl-w and etc. Additionally, some of them are the same fucking thing. For example, cdc28 IS cdc2 and ALSO is cyclin B. FUCK THIS.

The sad part is, I am not making this up.

ETA: ( EGADS! )

Life really has a way of kicking you right in the ass as soon as you begin to think you're finally pulling it together.

So my second year course beat my ass. The exam was so hard, frak. Goddamned russian son of a bitch. Biophysics of excitable cells = worst course ever.

I think I might subscribe to the belief that chronic dehydration is the root cause behind many if not most of the world's chronic health problems. I make this statement based on readings I've done by Dr. Batmanghelidj (coolest name ever), as well as personal anecdotal evidence. I get headaches that I think are probably migraines every once in a while. The usually last for about a week, and then go away for a few weeks or months. A few weeks ago I was having a headachy week. The first day I took Advil, which, as always, did less than nothing. The second day I went to bed at about 4 in the afternoon because I couldn't sit up and keep my eyes open. The third day, I drank three glasses of water when I felt my headache coming on shortly after noon. Within 20 minutes, it was gone. GONE. I continued to drink shitloads of liquids the rest of the day, and I never got the headache. The rest of the week I tried to drink helluva lots of water every day (and I paid for it by peeing every 15 minutes), but my headaches stayed away.

So this doctor, I think he is dead now, but when he was alive, he regularly cured people's pain by having them drink water. I can't remember a whole lot of his stories, and I'm pretty sure all they are are personal stories. I don't think a clinical trial has been done, but I could be wrong about that. At any rate, I don't necessarily need someone to tell me that a treatment works for a significant number of people if I already know that it works for me. Anyway, one story of his I remember in particular is about a patient with a stomach ulcer. This patient had been tortured for a long time with unbearable stomach pain. He had been given the strongest drugs known to man, but nothing worked. Then Dr. Batmanghelidj came along, and gave him a few glasses of water. Within a few minutes, the patient's pain had subsided to a manageable level.

On a scientific basis, I think the theory is pretty sound. We need a lot of water to perform all of our cellular processes. When we dont drink enough, or when we drink too many diuretics, we are robbing our cells of water. In an attempt to function without water, they steal it from other places. For example, our body is in general agreement that the brain is pretty important. So, if brain cells are thirsty, they're the first ones to get water from other parts of the body. A lot of our water is lost by breathing - you can see this in the winter when you have frosty breath. When our brain cells don't have water, a signal is sent to our lungs (in the form of histamine) to constrict the airways, and decrease respiration, to free up that water for the parched brain cells. As an individual, we perceive this as asthma, and doctors treat the symptom with antihistamines that allow us to breathe again. BUT this treatment does nothing for the root cause, which is insufficient water.

So, I'm going to try to drink more.

A study break that I pilfered ( from Rachel )

Oh the toys they let us bring home from school!



( Now for the science behind that... )

This was a good weekend. I managed to do a 5 k run yesterday, and a 16 k bike ride. Today my legs don't hurt anywhere near as much as I think they should, which I am taking as just another bonus.

I think I finished my immunology lab report. It's a piece of shit, but it's pretty much as done as it's going to be. My level of caring about it is off the chart in the negative direction.

I'm having trouble initiating the studying schedule. All I can think about is moving in with Andrew in May. It makes studying about chemical synapses and non-stimulatory membranes pale in comparison.

On the 19th us biochem geeks are going on a total bender. It should be a blast, especially because we're having a shot-in-a-test-tube making contest since Paula stole a massive box of test tubes for us. Carolyn may bring Cranium, which is probably the nerdiest game that could turn into a drinking game EVAR. I can't fucking wait.

Clipless pedals actually scare the shit out of me. On Friday we went out for a bike ride around the subdivision here, and as I may have previously mentioned, clipless pedals? Clip your shoes into the pedals. Also? I can barely touch the ground when seated on my bike. Also? I can't touch the ground with my toes in fear of damaging the cleats on my shoes. This combination makes stopping very, very dangerous for me. Late in the ride, I was approaching a stop sign, and I tried to unclip my feet in preparation to stop. However, I lack talent in the unclipping of the feet category, and therefore, when I actually came to a stop, I just...fell over. Kind of in slow motion. And of course in doing so, my feet were torn out of the pedals, giving me the freedom to save myself just after I needed it. The main problem with this was that I scratched my pedals on the cement. Also the guy driving the truck on the intersecting road totally saw me and I'm sure had I had the time to look up from my impending impact, I would have seen him guffawing.

I am so tired of missing Andrew. I make a career out of it, and I am way past the age of retirement. Fack.

This enzymology report/immunology presentation/immunology report is/are kicking my ass. All weekend, all day today, and it's only 4ish. I'm also tired of school. I'm so glad this semester is almost over.

Beverly Hills 90210 is probably the best show they could put on at 4 pm on weekdays. It's sooo eighties, and I'm totally into the storyline since I caught a few episodes over the past few months. You've gotta love a show on which everyone has had sex with everyone else.

My new Kona zing is my new boyfriend. Although I feel as though if it were given a pronoun, it would be feminine...so, my new Kona zing is my new girlfriend. She's sky blue, and shiny, and so fucking beautiful. I'll find a picture to share the love. ( zing! )

Isn't she pretty? Aren't you jealous? She and I have been getting intimate on a pretty regular basis. It's sexy. I took her outside for a ride as soon as I got her, and I almost (ALMOST) fell when I was trying to stop. This was partly due to the fact that with clipless pedals your feet are clipped into the pedals, partly due to the fact that I was going downhill at the time, partly due to the nature of the shoes which, as it happens, one cannot stand on the toes of because one might damage the clip, and partly because due to my freakishly long femurs (as I've been told), my seat is up pretty high and I can't really reach the ground. But, did I fall? NO. I am a lady.

Saturday night I made the most awesome dress I have ever made. It looks professional. And it looks like I paid a LOT of money for it. In reality, I paid under $10 for the fabric, and spent about two hours cutting and sewing. And voila! Beauty! I'd post a picture of it too, but then it would detract from the surprise factor when I wear it out on the miaden voyage. I was just too excited not to mention it.

Group work is the devil. Working with someone who speaks five languages of which English is only one is especially challenging. Communicating with this guy is so frigging taxing, I'm exhausted. I have to correct almost every sentence he writes because it doesn't make grammatical sense.

Oh my god, there was a Seinfeld episode type thing on earlier where they did a bunch of recap things, or something, they took scenes from all throughout the series and stuck them together. At one point they were doing bloopers...I was laughing so hard tears were actually streaming down my face. TV shows generally don't make me laugh that hard. Oh man, Seinfeld is hilarious.

OK, I should get back to my fucking enzymology report. Fucking enzymology.

Setting: Immunology II lecture, earlier today

Kaushik: (crazy accent that is very difficult to comprehend) "Vell, you know, some viruses practice molecular mimicry, and this can lead to autoimmunity. Let's say, for example, the cocksucking virus shares an epitope with myocytes..."

Me: experience a moment of shock, then collapse into uncontrollable giggles.

Stella leans over: "I know you're thinking what I'm thinking." She chuckles.

Kaushik: "...and so this cocksucking virus..."

Eric leans over: "Did he just say...cocksucking virus?"

Me: "Oh yes" return to uncontrollable giggles.

Stella: uncontrollable giggles.

Stella and I are 12. I honestly have no. clue. what Kaushik was actually saying, but it sounded exactly like "cocksucking", and holy fuck, I am still laughing just remembering. Today was our last lecture with him, for which I am grateful, and I am glad it ended on a high note.

Hahaha, could you imagine?

ETA: I actually did some pubmedding, and I think he was referring to the "coxsackievirus", which does indeed sound like "cocksucking", even when spoken by someone who's first language is english. Hehehe.

( because this is the week from hell ) and it's my birthday so I can not study if I want to.

This winter storm bastard son of a bitch is going to completely destroy my weekend plans of adventure and grandeur. Fuck you winter, fuck you Mother Nature, and fuck you March. You never bring spring weather, only sorrow and woe.

At least now I can do my homework.

EDIT: In biophysics today, my prof said "...and this represents an open hatch" and my immediate response was "Oh YAY! LOST is on tonight!" Heh.

Andrew has a Grad Gala coming up this Friday, for which I obviously had to shop for a dress, shoes, and a purse. I successfully located and bought a dress and a purse, but shoes were less than procurable. This was partially because shoes are generally around $100 more than I would be willing to pay, and partially because Andrew was with me while I was shopping for them, and my shoe shopping involves many a: "Oh I like this...oh wait, no I don't, look at the heel! Oooooh, look at these, they're so pretty, I could wear these with- oh, nothing, because they're TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS. Oh these ones are nice but I would like them better if they were more like these, which are fine but would be better in another colour....maybe I like the first ones?" and so on. Thus, I feel uncomfortable shoe shopping with others because I don't like inconveniencing other people. I imagine standing around listening to me think in circles is somewhat inconveniencing.

Anyway, when I got home I shoe shopped online. This is normally a very fruitful endeavour of mine; Spring (or Transit, or whatever) often has sales on for their online store that aren't applicable in store. I managed to find a pair of shoes that I loved, and they were only $20, so I ordered them up. On Sunday, Andrew left and I decided to go check out Transit (Spring?) in store to see if I could buy something there, just in case my order took longer than a week to arrive. I found a pair of shoes that I adored, they were cute, the heel was wearable, and they were on sale for $10. Clearly, I snatched them up and never looked back.

The shoes I ordered online arrived today. I was very excited, I never get mail, and getting shoes in the mail is probably one of the most titillating mail I could receive. Needless to say, I ripped open the box, only to find that the shoes I had ordered were exactly the same shoe I picked out in store a mere three days after ordering them online.

I may have a poor memory, but I sure as hell know my tastes.

You know what would be awesome (note I use the word "awesome" loosely here to include such definitions as "ruin my life")? If the faculty of my school goes on strike in 4 or so weeks. Yeah, that would ROCK. As in, assrape me. Fuck. -insert first 60 seconds of Four Weddings and a Funeral- Fuck.

This week is also "awesome". Two midterms, three lab reports, an assignment...god I am boring myself and I'm supposed to be interested in this shit.

So I half bought a new road bike. And by half, I mean 1/10th. Or so. And by 1/10th, I mean it's still at the store because I lack sufficient funds to buy the actual bike and enjoy it. But, someday soon, I will, and I will become a prostar cyclist, and I will race at the Cobourg du in the summer, and I will kickass suck, and I will love it.

I woke up early today to do pilates, and I rode my bike for half an hour after school. Because Tuesdays = sit on my ass through SEVEN HOURS of class with NO BREAK. Fuck you Tuesday. But I feel very active and healthy now. Plus I had 5 servings of fruit and vegetables, which technically isn't enough under the new Canada Food Guide, but honestly, I don't actually eat enough food in a day to get the 7-8 or whatever I'm supposed to get. The volume of food required to meet the requirements of that thing is astronomical.

Aaaaanyways, biophysics is ridiculous and I don't understand it at all, and it is a second year course. Also, advanced cell bio is insane and there is so much detail in that course that it took me 7 hours to read through the notes for the midterm just once. And do you think I could explain to you what PI-3 kinase acts on and what its substrate then does and so on and so forth until the ultimate result? Well, I can because I happen to have that page of notes in front of me, but if I were to close the book, I'd be all PI-3 kinase whaaa? And not like Lambton WHAT, no. Not like that at all. Fuck I need to study.

Go Obama.

This weekend, in a word, blew. I spent the entire time "studying" (read: making food, doing dishes, cleaning, watching tv, playing hexic, etc), and didn't really learn anything except that I know nothing about cell bio, and even less about enzymology. My friday presentation in advanced cell bio went well, I didn't screw up or faint or anything, so I was happy with that.

Is it reading week yet?

This is only my second reading week ever, and I'm going to have to spend it doing so much frigging work. I have to learn everything we have done in biophysics up to this coming friday, because I understand that course about much as I love winter, which is to say, not at all. I have to write an ezymology lab report for which I have NO ACTUAL DATA because Paula has been one lazy ass and has sent us precisely nothing since two weeks ago. Otherwise, I could be almost done that shizz. I will also have an immunology lab report to write. I need to find a place to live in the spring. It won't be relaxing, methinks. And now:

( Because I have three midterms I should be studying for... )

( Wouldn't it be interesting if we had to model ourselves after what google said we were? )

Oh man, that was awesome. "Marsha needs to give Archie his balls back" HAHA

I am employed with the Industrial BioDevelopment Laboratory for the summer. I am quite ecstatic about this development. I have a job! Yay!

Also, I would just like to mention that I applied for: 1 job. I was granted: 1 interview. And I received: 1 job offer. If that isn't perfection, I'm not sure what is.

I am in lust with the "new" Hedley album. In particular, the song Old School is really awesome, mostly because I feel almost as if I am in the stage of my life of which he is singing about, and it makes me nostalgic. Heh.

( Lyrics )

In other news, American Gladiator is classic. I should be studying. I may have gotten a job, but I am not sure because there is some confusion. I have so much work to do that I have no idea where to start, and it's not quite at the pressure point at which I can't afford to be doing anything else or I will FAIL. So, I am on here. Updating. About how much work I should be doing.

Lost is almost on, which is cause for much celebration, and also the cause for my Jack icon. Heh. Although, all my "Jack's crying, must be Wednesday" icons are totally useless now, since Lost is now on Thursdays....damn.

When I was younger, Sunday nights were awesome. When I was really little, Superman was on, and if we were home from my grandparents' place early enough, we could watch it. Then, when I was a bit older, The X-Files was on, and as we all know, The X-Files was and is and will always be the greatest show to ever have existed. As a side note, I am extremely pumped for the X-Files movie which is due to be released July 25th this year, which happens to coincide with the day I'm scheduled to shit myself in excitement.

Anyway, to return to the point of my post, Sunday nights are crap now, especially since the writers are all on strike. Family Guy is never new. The Simpsons was actually new tonight, and I enjoyed it, but half an hour of a few chuckles doesn't make up for the fact that tomorrow morning I have to suck it up and get back into the routine of school, homework, apply for jobs, and dick off and feel guilty about not doing homework.

To add to this miserable excuse for the end of the weekend, Sunday nights are often marked by my leaving Andrew for at least another week. I'm getting so sick and tired of having to say goodbye to him all the fucking time. It's ridiculous.

Linux rules. I sincerely wish that my printer would work with it, and also Sigmaplot. If these things were compatible, my computer would rock so hard the boat would capsize.

Back to membrane biochem (woo to the hoo).

( sooo much homework )